Fred, George, and Black Friday

Heyy everyone! Hope you had a brilliant Black Friday, I know I did! But more on that later.

So my bestest Algebra buddy Kayla named her conscience George, affectionately known as Georgie. Well, I have followed suit. Henceforth, my conscience shall be christened Fred. Now if you understand the logic behind this choice, go ahead and have yourself a little chuckle. If you don't understand, just sit there and look pretty. I'll give you a hint, its the same logic behind naming my cats Mrs. Norris and Crookshanks.

FINE! Its from Harry Potter. Fred and George are the Weasley twins that are always causing trouble, and I just thought it was fitting. Now, as everyone should know, Fred was tragically murdered in the final battle against Voldemort and the death eaters at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Let us have a brief moment of silence to mark the passing of our dear departed -er- fictional character.

So Fred and I are just here hanging out now. We had a great day along with Mom. We got started around 4:45 this morning. Mom came into my room and just started babbling until I woke up. We were out the door at about 5:30 and on our way to Turkey Creek, ie. basically an insanely huge shopping center. As you can see from the list on that website, I mean insanely huge. There were tons of people there. When we arrived we planned to go to Target first, but the line to get into Target went down the sidewalk past at least six large stores and meshed into the line for Wal Mart.

We ended up going to Old Navy first, which wasn't nearly as terrible as we thought it would be. Only downside was I saw my sixth grade English teacher. I didn't talk to her, but, of course, I texted Caitlin, who proceeded to remind me that we hate our sixth grade English teacher with a passion.

Long story short, in sixth grade Caitlin and I were both amateur writers and we were just beginning to learn how to express ourselves. We wrote poetry and stories that our superprep classmates and Barbie-doll wannabe guidance counselor decided was 'morbid' and our English teacher got in the middle of all of it. She accused us of being spoiled attention-seekers and basically ruined our sixth grade year, which really sucked especially for me because I had amazing friends in sixth grade that I had to leave the following year, and I wish now that I had been able to spend more drama-free time with them.

So back to the shopping. After Old Navy we got to Target, got some coffee, did some Christmas shopping, went to Wal Mart, did some Christmas Shopping, and then went to Pier 1, but they were closed, so we went to Borders. AND I FINALLY GOT 'ECLIPSE'! Seriously, you have no idea how happy this makes me. It has been out of the library for two weeks and it has been driving me crazy[-er than normal] not reading it. Seriously, the level of commitment to my three loyal readers is amazing, because I really should be reading right now. After the happy happy experience at Borders we went to Bed, Bath, and Beyond and then lunch at Panera at 10:something in the morning, but we had been going since 4:45.

After that we hit Aeropostale and went to the mall. It was absolutely completely insane. We got makeup and a few other things and got out as fast as we could. On the way home we thought long and hard, and concluded that all of our Thanksgiving calories were burned. Fred agrees.

After all of our shopping adventures we were exhausted. Fred fell asleep before me and for once I didn't have a voice in my head talking to me. I fell asleep on the couch watching What Not To Wear without even trying to determine Clinton's mysterious orientation. A definite first.

When I woke up I ate dinner and then got on here and began recording my Black Friday saga. Unfortunately, my soulless father (just kidding) kicked me off the computer around nine and I couldn't finish. Once I was kicked off, I did laundry and watched What Not To Wear (it was a marathon) until ten when Stacy London's new talk show premiered. I watched it and giggled a little, and then concluded that she is a conceited bitch. She is a person much like Tyra Banks (whom I also despise) who makes a living making people pretty so they will fit into her world. I now pretty much hate her, but, of course, I will be watching Fashionably Late next Friday at 10 on TLC.

And finally, finally, finally, after all this, I began to read 'Eclipse'. I promised myself I would only read three chapters, and technically I did. I read four chapters, but I had already read the first chapter in the advanced reader's edition of 'New Moon'. I had to reread it, though, because I had read all of the 'New Moon' extras on Stephenie Meyer's website since then and I couldn't really remember what actually happened. So far, I love it. These amazing books are still making me laugh, cry, gasp, and forget to breathe. Well, I haven't cried yet, but I probably will. I did in the last one.

xo
Helen

And The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb

News flash: Jon is the best boyfriend ever. Not only is he totally sweet and makes me unbelievably happy (Kayla, prepare to be jealous) he has accepted that he will probably always be second to Edward Cullen. =D Just kidding [a little].

So that's the end to my day, nothing other than eating happened in the middle, and it began with smoke detectors going off because Dad almost set the garage on fire. Fun day, huh?

So as we speak, or more accurately as I type, I am searching desperately for a Twilight wallpaper that doesn't have Emily Browning in it. I mean seriously, how hard it it? I mean she's pretty and I know she was a contender for Bella for a while, but she LOST! So move on people and make some wallpapers with just the best quotes and stuff or something. Aha! Found one! Its the tulip from the 'New Moon' cover and a totally black background. I may have to do some editing, though. Maybe add my favorite quote to it or something, or just 'Edward and Bella'. Oh, the possibilities.

Oh, in my travels through cyberspace I stumbled upon the Twilight Lexicon forums and decided that I absolutely must join. Now I just need to come up with an extremely clever and adorable screen name...

And with that, I think I'm going to bed. Lots and lots of shopping to do tomorrow. Before I leave, though, I have to show you my new favorite avatars:


And now I'm done.

xo
Helen

.5

So today..Lots of fun.

The wrestling match was just like I thought it would be. I sat with Jonathan, Emily, Destinie, Scott, and Veronica and made so many gay sex jokes that I don't even remember half of them. I took a picture of the match and about 200 of my friends and I, but I didn't realize until I got home that green is SO not my color, so those have been confiscated in the interest of public safety.

When I got home I totally pigged out on pizza -just a little practice for tomorrow. I have decided, though, that its ok, because the Thanksgiving scientists have devised an ingenious system: You stuff your face to the point of pure unadulterated gluttony on Thursday, and then on Friday you wake up at some ungodly hour with all of the other crazy people and go shopping. While shopping, you encounter many obstacles -severe lack of parking spaces, long lines, aggressive housewives determined to get Tickle Me Elmo- that force you to walk, jog, and run all over creation, hence burning all of the calories that you consumed on Thursday. In fact, you can even stop by Starbucks and pick up a drink with more whipped cream and chocolate in it than actual coffee without guilt. It is pure genius. I bet Oprah has something to do with it.

I suppose I should explain my 'Oprah is God' theory. It all started a few months ago when Mom and I were bored, as many great ideas do. I don't remember exactly how it came about, but here is the logic behind it.

Oprah makes things happen. She basically created now-celebrities Dr. Phil and Rachael Ray. She has gotten people green cards, new houses, makeovers, and new lives. This and some other little things -including the fact that the whole theory ticks off Dad- led to our realization that Oprah is God. So Ellen DeGeneres was absolutely right.

Now, this doesn't mean that I don't find Oprah obnoxious. I find all talk show hosts obnoxious on some level. They think that having an hour long time slot with their name on it purchased from a broadcasting network makes them hot stuff, but it really isn't the case. They're still people. They're just people with TV shows named after them and more money than the average American will ever see. But that doesn't make them hot stuff. Bill Gates is hot stuff. 'Nuff said.

And finally, be sure to go to http://amillionthanks.org/ to see how you can send words of encouragement to US troops stationed around the world via text messages. Most major service providers have agreed to make the messages free, so get to it!

And with that, I'm going to bed. I have a lot to eat tomorrow, and I'll need my strength. Good night and have a happy Thanksgiving.

xo
Helen